The Relaxed Writer

Think You're Too Lazy? 3 Reasons Why I Don't Buy It (Not One Bit.)

by Marla Beck, MFA, CTACC

Recently I coached several mom writers who decided that they were too lazy to achieve their writing goals.  When I heard their stories and harsh self-judgments, it really broke my heart.  I wasn't convinced they were "lazy" at all.  And I'm not convinced you are, either. 

If you're prone to feeling like a Lazy Writer, please read on.  Here are 3 practical tips to get you out of your rut and into action. 

1.  "I can't get up early to write." 

 Can someone please tell me who decided that the only best time to write is early in the morning?  

Don't get me wrong:  personally, I'm a chirpy morning person who loves to get up at 5am to meditate, stretch and "be" before the day begins.  (Of course, by 9pm I'm not much of a conversationalist, but that's another story.) 

We're not all made the same. And early risers don't get dibs on writerly productivity. 

I may sound flip here, but I do mean it sincerely.  If you aren't someone who gets up early to write, and you feel like the reason why is because you're "lazy," please S-T-O-P. 

Sounds like your body has a natural rhythm that differs from the go-go-go norms of our society.

And that's OK. 

What matters is that you release the need to be anything other than you are.  (That bears repeating:  Release the need to be anything other than you are.)

What matters is that you stop draining your energy with self-rebuke and start focusing instead on finding writing and productivity solutions that work for YOU.  

Remember those mom writers?  Once I helped them to reframe their dilemma ("I really want to write, but I'm not getting up early enough to do it") and let go of expecting themselves to be different…we were able to make real, tangible progress. Today, they're showing up regularly to work on book-length writing projects -- a far cry from where we began! 

If you think you can't be a writer because the early hours don't work for you, think again and follow these writers' leads.  By letting go of "lazy" and starting to accept themselves just as they are…

They freed up more energy to write, and they starting doing their work when it worked for them.

They tracked their progress and discovered their own best productivity practices.

They're writing their books.

You can just imagine how much happier they are.  All because they became willing to let go of "lazy."

2.  "I blew off the whole week."

 Let me tell you something: we often pressure ourselves to produce, produce, produce.  (I know I can fall into this quite easily. And when I do, it doesn't serve me well.)

When a client comes to our coaching call with the report that he blew off an entire week and spent it being "lazy," I hear that as an important signal.  (Not as a truth.)

Because here's the deal:

Sometimes we get out of our own way long enough to dig in and really attack our goals.  We work longer than we'd planned.  We add in extra writing sessions and start to burn ourselves out.

Then our Inner Rebel, that stabilizing force inside of us that wants to regulate our energy, does it's job and….well, it rebels.

So we space out online.

Get suddenly obsessed with media, trolling for back issues or episodes or new releases.

We may even blow off our exercise routines, household chores, etc.

If you think you're "too lazy" to pursue your writing goals because you had an off-week (or an off-month), I'm not buying it.

Get back in balance by acknowledging and honoring your need for rest and play.   Your "laziness" is just a signal to rebalance your energy and your life.

3.  "I'll never do it - I haven't so far…I'm just lazy."

 Well hello there, smokescreen.

 If you're novel's still not finished, your business isn't launched or your freelance career still isn't on track after years of yearning and wishing it were so…

Guess what?  I'm not buying it. That kind of reasoning is like saying to yourself, "I'll never lose the extra pounds because it hasn't happened yet."

(Huh?)

If you are willing to take action to achieve your personal, life and business goals, you're going to have to get a bit uncomfortable.

When you to take a new risk and dare to say YES! to your dreams, you may challenge your comfort zones when it comes to:

- cash (sometimes)
- self-confidence (often)
- saying "no" to other things
- standing up for what you believe in

(Personally, I think that when we're learning new things, getting more clear about our commitments to ourselves and others, and daring to stand up more for what we believe in, that's an easy & wonderful recipe for happiness.  But, I digress.)

Given the scary and unknown future, it's no wonder we often choose to stay comfortable by keeping things just the way they are.

If you choose to continue calling yourself lazy, you don't have to do anything but nurse the same old story, and let years go by without truly living your life or going for what matters most to you.

It's tough to remember sometimes, but we always have a choice. 

 What will you choose today?  To stay stuck by labeling yourself "lazy?"  Or to side-step your excuses by learning to address your "I'm lazy" habit head-on?

I'm rooting for you!

Five Keys to Making More Time to Write | Part 5

Meet Tad, a 40-year-old novelist. 

Tad wants to make more time to finish his manuscript.  He sets a target date.  He decides to discipline himself to write every day--a lot--until the novel is finished. 

Period.   

Tad experiences some early successes but soon "life" starts to interfere with his writing.  The laundry piles up.  He has to attend his girlfriend's cousin's wedding.  A friend comes to visit from out of town and stays three days.

Tad tries to regain his momentum after these setbacks, but he never quite succeeds.  His mood dims.  And after a few off-track weeks, discouragement sets in. 

"I'll never finish the novel," he tells himself. 

"I've failed, yet again."

* * *

Key #5 to Making More Time to Write:  Settle for nothing less than a writing schedule that works.

Tad created a simple writing schedule for himself.  He knew what his goal was, and he decided he had to hustle to attain it. 

But Tad's simple plan didn't work.  Here's why.

[Continued...]

image credit:  TonytheMisfit (flickr)

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Five Keys to Making More Time to Write | Part 3

Back in Lesson One, we looked at how your beliefs and thoughts can compromise your ability to make more time to write. 

Remember:

• You won't be able to protect your writing time against distractions until you believe that the act of "writing" itself is valid and valuable.  

• You won't be able focus and use the writing time you do have until you believe that your project is important and worth pursuing.

Realizing the relationship between what you think and what you do with your time is a terrific first step.

But to move your writing life forward, you've got to begin responding to self-doubt differently.   Here is a three-step model to help you do just that.   

[Cont'd.]

image credit: theogeo (Flickr)

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Web Reads for Writers: Time Tips and Creative Juice for Poets, Fiction Writers

Today, a quick list of great web reads for writers on managing your time and juicing up your poetry or fiction.  First though, some info about recent posts you've seen here on The Relaxed Writer.

"Making More Time to Write" e-course

For the next three days, you'll be seeing more excerpts from my new time management e-course for writers, "Making More Time to Write."  

As a busy mom and solo entrepreneur, I know just how danged difficult it can be to make realistic plans (and follow through) with personal writing projects.  As a life coach for writers, I know that change--sustainable, productive change--really can happen.  And that one of the very best ways to start is by revamping the ways we think about "time" and "writing." That's where the e-course comes in.

I've created five brief email lessons to help you focus on YOUR OWN writing and to inspire you to think differently about your time and your writing.  So. This little email course is kind of like a work-week's full of free coaching from me. 

You're seeing e-course excerpts here on the blog for two reasons. Obviously, if you haven't already, I'm inviting you to join in and sign up. Secondly, each lesson features a brief interactive exercise.  Posting intentions and plans online is one way to participate, and the posts provide a "place" for folks to do just that.

So there ya go.  To learn more about "Making More Time to Write," visit the e-course webpage on CoachMarla.com.  Or, click here and send a blank email to get started.  You'll get five daily time management lessons and a complimentary subscription to "The Relaxed Writer" ezine, featuring coaching news and discounts not available here on the blog.

* * *

Now for the Web Reads

>>A Dose of Time Management Mojo

Read time management interviews and tips, including an awesome quick time tip and my "How to Make the Most of an Off-Track Week" guest post, over at Make a Scene. 

>>A Shot of Poetic Inspiration

Listen to a free, two-hour poetry workshop led by Sage Cohen by clicking over to Writing The Life Poetic.

>>A Thought-Provoking Tool for Plotting Your Fiction

Explore "Hamlet = Cinderella.  Graphing Stories with Vonnegut," over on LiveWires.

Let me know what you think.  -Marla

image credit:  Drustar (Flickr)

Connect with Me on Twitter:  @MarlaBeck

Five Keys to Making More Time to Write | Part 1

You know that sense of possibility that comes with buying a new planner, scheduling software, or other time management system?

It's easy to think that an outside tool will tame your schedule and manage your time.  But think for a moment.  A calendar or schedule is a repository:  a place to record intentions about how you'd like to use your time. 

The real art of time management takes place long before you ink "writing worksession" onto your calendar. The real art of making more time to write begins from within.

[Continued...]

image credit:  Brenda-Starr~ (flickr)

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How to Write All Weekend

For a few years in my 20s, I met weekly with a group of painters, writers and musicians to discuss our progress as we worked Julia Cameron's spiritual path to creativity, The Artist's Way.

My friends and I took "artist dates" and met every weekend to share the sculptures, sonnets and songs we'd created. Over time, many of us changed our lives to enable us to make creative expression a top priority. 

One day, a member of our group announced amazing news.

"I've saved up some cash," he said.  "I just quit my day job.  I'm going to write full-time!"

40 extra hours a week? To write?  I was incredibly envious.  (Happy for him, but envious.)

My newly full-time artist friend did some good creative work at first, but as the months passed by, he got depressed.  Without a daily structure and routine, he just couldn't focus. 

He stopped making art.

***

As anyone who's ever dedicated an afternoon to writing and found themselves wasting the hours away instead, more time doesn't necessarily equate to more--or better--writing.  

It is entirely possible to drown your productivity in an abundance of time.  With skillful time management you can avoid the perils of unstructured, extended work sessions (what I call "time bloat") and stay focused on your writing. 

Here's how.

Tip #1 - Segment & Stop

Planning to "write all weekend?"

You'll create urgency and focus for yourself if you break down your overall goal ("20 hours of focused work on my novel") into a series of discrete writing sessions.  (One of my clients, Dan Schifrin, calls his work sessions "modules." I like this approach.)

Adjust the length of your work sessions to fit your needs.

• Most folks I've coached do well with planning up to 2 solid hours of writing at a time.
• You may prefer to plan for 45 minutes at a time or 4 hours...everyone's different.

When you're ready, note the time and begin writing.  When your session's elapsed and your time is up, (here's the rub)...

Stop. 

Be as serious about honoring your time limit as you are about your writing.  Stopping when you say you will builds integrity ("I do what I say!") and also creates urgency and focus: your own personal deadline.

Tip #2 - Reward Yourself

As a Kiwi friend of mine used to say:  Good on ya!

If you've followed my suggestions, you segmented your time into smaller work sessions and stopped writing when said you would.

You wrote. And you honored your commitment to your own deadline. 

You deserve a little reward for all this work, dontcha' think?

The key to staying energized and alert is to give yourself periods of "guilt-free play" (this is Neil Fiore's term, from his fantastic book, The Now Habit) between back-to-back writing sessions.  

My suggestion is that you shoot for 5-10 minutes of play for every hour of focused writing.  As an example, I often write--and coach--in 40-50-minute work sessions beginning at the top of the hour.  I use the last 10 minutes of each hour to call a friend, stretch outside or sip a cup of tea.  After awhile, this way of segmenting your time will become a habit.

Conscious "fun" breaks are refreshing and relaxing.  An added benefit? In this space of "not-trying," you also give new ideas and insights a chance to surface.

Two guidelines for you: 

1.  Step away from the writing desk.  (This means putting down the pen and closing the laptop, if you have to.)

2.  Choose an activity that's very different from writing.  (Get back into your body, walk outside, feed the fish.) You'll find plenty of suggestions for fun on this blog. Just search The Relaxed Writer's "Ease" and "Balance" categories for ideas.

Be deliberate with your time and honor your need for play.  Using these tips, you'll alternate "structure" with play and your writing-weekend word count grow.

image credit:  PinkSherbertPhotography (Flickr.com)

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Follow Me on Twitter:  @MarlaBeck

Need More Time to Write? (an interview with The Relaxed Writer)

Call me shy.

A few months ago I was interviewed by Shonell Bacon for her quarterly online publication, SisterDivas Magazine.  In the interview, we talked about my work as a life coach for writers and what it means to be a "relaxed writer."  Until now, I hesitated to share it with you because frankly...I thought I was awfully  long-winded.  :-)

But if you're desperate to make more time to write, in the article I outline a deceptively simple and very effective exercise to help you get started. 

Click here to read "In the Know with The Relaxed Writer".

And stop back by and let us know what you think.

Confusing "Busyness" with "Business?" Two Productivity Tips for Writers

Never confuse movement with action.  --Ernest Hemingway

It is quite easy to confuse "busy-ness" with "business," especially if you begin your work session without a clear focus and intention.  Here are two productivity tips to help you focus your writing sessions.

• If your goal is to finish writing a manuscript, ask:  "What specific actions will move me forward?"

Here's an incredibly obvious but (judging from my own and my clients' experiences) oh-so-difficult concept to remember:

• In order to finish writing a piece, you must write, even if your end-product is a hole-filled "swiss-cheese draft."

• If your goal is to boost your freelancing income, ask yourself:  "Is this an income-producing activity?"

Resist the temptation to confuse these writing-related tasks with the task of writing itself:

• research
• revision
• platform-building (teaching, social networking, blogging, etc.)
• marketing (researching/approaching agents, setting up readings, etc.)
• purchasing, record-keeping and other administrative tasks

Can you relate?  What other tasks convince you that you're writing, even when you're not?

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If you struggle with staying focused and moving forward, productivity coaching can really help you stay on track. Email me at <[email protected]> to inquire about a new and affordable 6-week coaching group starting in late-March/mid-April. 

 

Spike Lee on Early Rising

Anyone else read Spike Lee on early rising?   

From the recent New Yorker Spike Lee profile:

Releasing movies at an average of nearly one a year, Lee has maintained a pace matched, in this country, only by Woody Allen...He is able to accomplish so much in part because he often rises at 5 A.M. “You want to get a lot done, you gotta get up in the morning,” he told me. The rest, he says, is “time management.”     

What strategies do you use to get the most out of your day?

Enjoy "Take Back Your Time Day"

There's much that we Relaxed Writers can do to use our time more mindfully and wisely. 

For traditionally employed (read:  day-jobbing) writers, however, there are less free hours for us to work with.  In fact, according to the non-partisan coalition, Take Back Your Time, today's Americans work longer days -- with less vacation time -- than ever before in history.

The folks at Take Back Your Time are working to put Time Poverty issues on policy agendas in the United States and Canada.  Visit their website to learn more about their work and how you can become involved.

After you've marked October 24, 2009 on your calendar (that's next year's Take Back Your Time Day), take a moment to consider how you might celebrate your very own "Take Back Your Time Day."   

Perhaps you'll leave time stress behind and indulge in a long bath?  Or enjoy a relaxed dinner with family or friends?

I've decided to go relax on the couch with a good book in-hand...at least until the baby wakes up from her nap.